Birds Do It, Bees Do It

And this bee -- and her mister -- did it this past weekend!

We've just finished packing up -- the post-wedding cleaning up will hafta wait -- for our dreamy dozen days in Italy. As much as I want to sit and replay every. single. moment. of our wedding (and the days leading up to it) with our nearests and dearests, I'm also giddy at the thought of having my husband (!!!) whisk me away. I couldn't board the plane, though, without giving the hive a little something to buzz about until we get back...

We watched in awe as our friends and family came together Saturday to celebrate something so simple, and yet, so significant: our love. The day -- 5:00 a.m. 'til midnight -- was filled with unexpected surprises, intense emotions...and amazing photography.


(Cindy Patrick's responsible for the drool you most likely now have dripping on your computer keys.)

Much, much, much more to come!

Lotsa love,

MRS. Bruschetta

Day #638

Time has been significant for the Bruschettas. In 2001 when we officially acknowledged each other as boyfriend and girlfriend, six days separated what would become our dating anniversary from my high school graduation. For the next few years, our own routines kept us busy during the week -- but weekends often meant visits, whether for movie dates or (more frequently) study dates. And in 2005 when I began grad school, months became the new marker, filling the time between my visits home to Philly or Mr. Bruschetta's several treks up to Boston.

Clearly, patience has been pretty important, too. After the mister's on-bended-knee and with-ring-box-in-hand moment, 638 days separated us from our wedding day. But today, the wait will finally end when I marry my best friend.

To the hive and my fellow bees: I'm eternally grateful for this opportunity to share the whirlwind journey that has been the last six months. I truly hope you've enjoyed following along at least half as much as I've enjoyed writing each post. (And since I still have much to share with you all -- including surprises I didn't want to reveal before the wedding, as well as details and reflections I shifted to the back burner as the end of August rapidly approached -- rest assured I'll remain a presence until you've heard our entire story!)

To our parents, siblings, family and friends: Thank you for the love you've given unconditionally over the years -- and for the support and encouragement you've provided throughout our engagement. Our hearts are fuller and our lives are richer because you are with us.

And to my mister: We knew years ago that we were perfect for each other; we've since shared countless memorable (and often tasty!) experiences and shaped one another into the people we are today. I'm so proud of all you've accomplished, how you've created a solid foundation for your -- and our -- future. This next year will be amazing -- we've worked toward it for the past eight years (can you even believe that?!), and I can't wait to continue our adventure together. You're my bestest, and I love you more than these simple words can convey.


Rain or shine, I just can't wait to get married!

XOXO,

Miss Bruschetta

(Almost) Happily Ever After

Boy, was I naive. As a child, I'd fantasized about my dream wedding* -- somehow also believing it would smoothly and immediately transition into the dream life, the stuff of movies and fairy tales.

And once you've got the perfect husband? Well, the perfect job and the perfect house -- if not already checked off the "Perfect Life" to-do list -- would surely fall easily into place!

(source)

Trust me, that won't be the case. We'll return, after the wedding and honeymoon, to our small-ish apartment, with ceilings that are prone to leaks when it rains too much and walls that have the uncanny ability to attract creepy-crawlies.

I'll head back to the 9-to-5 gig about which I'm decidedly "meh" -- while visions of a position that's more closely connected to my graduate degree (or something completely different [not to mention slightly unrealistic!] like launching a culinary career) jockey for the prime position in the forefront of my mind. (Come on, economy! Where's the love [and how 'bout the postings!] for communication professionals?)

And the mister will continue to wait tables by night, spending his days hitting the books to study up for the physical therapy boards so he can start the job he's already accepted (yea!) around October/November.

So really, our first few months of married life will look and feel quite similar to how we've spent the past few months -- something we foresaw and acknowledged during our Pre-Cana marriage preparation weekend in November 2008.

Although not much will change initially, we're expecting some major adjustments once Mr. Bruschetta starts working in his chosen field. For the first time in our relationship, neither of us will be in school. And we'll be able to loosen our belts a bit, thanks to another first: two full-time incomes. We've discussed how we'll divide our joint bills, and what we'll do to squirrel away funds into our savings.

But here's the real icing on this cake: Weekends will become the enjoyable break they're supposed to be for both of us. I'll happily trade my Saturday nights in (often spent catching up on my favorite blogs) for date night with Mr. Bruschetta, who'll no longer need to be schlepping food and drinks for lousy tips. I know a house will be in our future. For now, though, I'm just looking forward to cuddling up on the couch (or dining out in Philly) with my new husband (!!!).

What major life events will (or did) you still need to cross off after the wedding?

*I do think it's funny that, as a little Bruschetta, I'd also arbitrarily selected the "ideal" ages by which I wanted to be engaged (24) and married (26) -- and, oddly enough, those guesses turned out to be completely accurate!

A Different Kind of List

Mr. Bruschetta and I attended our church's Pre-Cana marriage preparation weekend six months ago. At the time, our wedding still seemed so far off. Most of the projects and tasks that are currently in the forefront of my mind (and even posted up on our wall) were merely half-formed ideas. At the time, I was blissfully ignorant (thinking only that everything will fall into place somehow) and completely content.

While I don't want to downplay the importance of the various talks -- on subjects ranging from money to sexuality to religion -- married couples shared with us that weekend, I will admit that, for us, one of the most valuable exercises was the icebreaker that kicked off the weekend.

Each person was asked to select his/her future spouse's most endearing quality. What is that one attribute of your husband- or wife-to-be that, at this exact moment, sums up what you love about him or her? We were informed that this characteristic can and will change frequently -- at any given time, there are a number of aspects jockeying for the top spot -- and encouraged to continue engaging in this activity after the weekend concluded.

(source)

We went around the room; first came the introduction ("This is my fiancee, NAME.") and then that person's most endearing quality. Soon, it was Mr. Bruschetta's turn. He started to speak, and I could feel my cheeks turning red.

Mr. Bruschetta shared how he loves when I find something -- often a really small detail or passing comment -- so funny that I can't stop laughing at it. Inevitably, he said, my delight will become contagious, and he'll soon find humor in whatever amused me initially.

At first, I was pretty embarrassed by his explanation, worrying about how it made me sound. But then I realized that he had selected something that's genuinely me, and captured a piece of a happy, carefree Miss Bruschetta. While others in the room looked at and spoke about the much bigger picture -- how loving, supportive and faithful their future spouse is, for example -- my mister chose instead to focus on such a small facet of my personality, showing he not only recognizes when this type of situation arises, but enjoys it himself.

Since that weekend, I've had a list running through my mind of Mr. Bruschetta's most endearing qualities. Taking a cue from his detail-oriented observation, I focus on little things that might otherwise go unnoticed. Do I feel silly for admitting I keep this "other" list going? Yeah, a little. But doing so helps remain me calm, and reminds me that I could stop all the planning right now, and as long as Mr. Bruschetta is waiting at the end of the aisle with an "I do" on his lips, that's all that matters.

Your turn, hive. At this precise moment, what is your fiance's most endearing quality?

2,922

June 14, 2001: Mr. Bruschetta and I had met up at a local diner, and were sitting across from each other in a booth. I don't remember what either of us ordered, but I do recall why we were there. About two weeks previous (following my uncharacteristically bold move), Mr. Bruschetta had been my prom date. And although I was graduating high school in less than a week, I liked him. A lot. I wanted to figure out if he felt similarly, and if we could start a relationship while I transitioned to college life. We were embarrassingly awkward, but sealed our evening with a kiss -- and the intention to refer to one another as boyfriend and girlfriend.

It's been 2,922 days, innumerable culinary experiences, countless (much less clumsy) kisses, and one proposal since the official start of "us." And we've celebrated annually with Flag Day dates -- below, we're posing for Mama Bruschetta before heading out to celebrate the first year with dinner and a night at the theatre.


Today is our final dating anniversary before we're married. So how did we commemorate our own elite eight? Well, that'll hafta wait for another post -- since the story is actually related to some details for our reception.

It's certainly going to feel weird starting back at zero following the wedding. I keep thinking we should get some sort of "credit" for all those years spent dating! How long did you and your fiance date before getting married?

Much Anticipated Con"GRAD"ulations

Last week marked a momentous occasion -- and an exciting few days -- in the Bruschetta household: My mister became a doctor!*



Dr./Mr. Bruschetta has worked immensely hard, tacking on this three-year physical therapy program immediately after his undergraduate degree, and working multiple (at times, up to five) part-time jobs while maintaining magna cum laude full-time student status. He's financed both his B.S. and DPT degrees himself (with the help of a whole lotta loans) and as a result, is incredibly organized and resourceful -- which, of course, has proved helpful during the wedding planning!


I've noticed how passionate the mister/doctor is about his chosen field -- sometimes, these observations have been when he's treating me, since (like Mrs. Cupcake) I'm a self-confessed klutz. I've gained an incredibly knowledgeable gym buddy who's created some of the most demanding and intense workouts I've ever attempted. And I'm over-the-moon thrilled that Doctor-Mister Bruschetta's reached his goal, and oh-so proud of him for doing so with such great focus.

Who knew I'd actually get lucky enough to marry a doctor?

Are you (or your fiance) celebrating any significant milestones mere months before your wedding?

*All the DPT students have finished the necessary courses, and are now completing the last requirement: their fourth and final clinical affiliation, which runs for 10 weeks. So although they all walked in the Commencement exercises, they won't be receiving diplomas until after the affiliations conclude.

Relationship Maintenance

This is Aubergine.







She's my six-month-old Honda Fit, so named for her purple hue and adorable eggplant-like shape. (I'm sharing her "baby" pictures from last November, since she's a pollen-covered mess now. I can't keep her clean for more than a day, so for now, I've stopped trying.) I've driven Aubs with care, trying not to accelerate too quickly or brake too harshly. At Daddy Bruschetta's insistence, I track her mileage to ensure she's running properly. I hate parking next to rusty, beat-up trucks -- or, really, any other vehicle -- so I usually select spots with no other cars in the immediate area (which means I've been getting a fair amount of exercise walking to my destinations from the back of the lot). And soon, she'll be due for her first "check-up."

This is, as you hopefully know by now, Mr. Bruschetta.



He's my best friend, fiance and, for the past two months, roommate. We've been together for nearly eight years, but moved into our first apartment just two months ago. Balancing wedding planning with settling into our new place and adjusting to one another's habits and preferences has been a challenge. We're so happy, though, to see each other every day -- instead of the two-ish times a week we were averaging before the move. And we've acclimated by tuning up our relationship in several significant ways.

We put it in writing.
I'm naturally a list-maker, and Mr. Bruschetta's embraced my desire to keep track of everything -- grocery lists and wedding to-do notes are the most frequently-penned items -- on magnetic notepads conveniently affixed to our freezer.

During our first few weeks of cohabiting, I used this area to jot down little things that would bug me -- like if Mr. Bruschetta left his cell charger plugged in even when the phone wasn't there -- that we'd discuss, so nothing would build up and boil over.

It's now a spot where, in addition to keeping track of items to pick up at the supermarket and tasks we need to work on for the wedding, we also write reminders ("Take your vitamins!") or notes ("I love you!") to each other. It's a fun surprise to come home and, if Mr. Bruschetta isn't there, check the notepad -- or really, anywhere around the apartment (the mister's been known to slide his messily-written sentiments between piles of my clean clothes, or stick them to objects, such as yesterday's "Hi, I'm clean" Post-It on the dishwasher) -- to see if he's left something for me.

We've cleaned up our act.
Neither of us wants to be characterized as the "messy" one, so Mr. Bruschetta and I have established strategies to keep the apartment clean. Among other tasks, Mr. Bruschetta's responsible for gathering and taking out the trash, and I wrangle the sheets and towels at laundry time. It's by no means a perfect system, but thus far has worked well for us!

We play with our food.
I've mentioned before that Mr. Bruschetta and I are foodies. We love eating out, but we also enjoy staying in and mixing up something delish -- something we weren't able to do frequently before the move. When we cook, we plan out a whole menu -- including drinks that complement the menu -- and divide out the tasks to create a tasty final product. Planning, creating and enjoying a meal together is really another form of intimacy. And our current kitchen is pretty tiny, so cooking together also helps bring us closer (::wink wink::).

How have you adapted (or will you adapt) to living with your fiance?